To Do The Work

It is learning to be happy right where you are - or at least content - that is the real game changer.
Not reaching. Not running. Just being.
To enjoy your inner world without constantly looking to the future.
To rest in the now.

But no one really tells you how hard this is.
We’re told to be present - to live in the moment - but rarely do we speak of the resistance that rises when we try.
How exhausting it can be to keep pulling yourself back, again and again, from the past and the future.
It’s tough, tough work.

The more you try to control what’s ahead, the more unhappy you become in the now.
You’re not living - you’re preparing. Bracing. Protecting.
And in doing so, you often miss the very thing you’re trying to preserve: this moment.

The other day I was walking, thinking about what I could do to prevent any “negative feelings” later.
I was planning how to stay emotionally safe later in the day - but right then, I was already feeling low.
Anxious. Tense. Off.

And I did nothing about it.
I wasn’t tending to the moment I was in.
I was already down, but instead of caring for that feeling, I was trying to prevent a different one from arriving later.
It’s absurd, really - but it’s what so many of us do.
Live in protection mode.

But that day, I noticed.
I caught myself.
I came back.

I allowed the feeling to be there - walked with it.
Didn’t try to escape. Didn’t try to fix.
Just stayed with what was.
And in that presence, something softened.

We all want joy.
We all want peace.
But the human experience has always included pain, fear, boredom, discomfort.
It’s not just joy we’re here for - it’s all of it.

Yet the world we live in teaches us to run from discomfort.
Scroll it away. Buy it away. Work it away. Numb it away.
And it’s no wonder we feel dysregulated - out of touch.

Real contentment, I think, comes from doing the opposite.
From allowing the full spectrum of emotions to move through you - not resisting them.
Letting yourself feel the sadness, the frustration, the grief, the joy, the pleasure - all of it.
Being in your body, in your breath, not lost in your screen or your spiraling thoughts.

It’s hard to do.
So hard.
It takes practice, daily. Moment by moment.
I’m not “there” yet - whatever that means -
But I’m more aware than I’ve ever been.

My aim is no longer constant happiness or success.
It’s presence.
It’s honesty.
It’s allowing.
It’s contentment.
It’s choosing to live the full human experience, not just the highlights.

And for me -
That feels like the truest path to authenticity.